Temporarily Finished

I so often hear people proclaim that they cannot paint or draw.  What they actually mean is that they cannot draw or paint in a manner they perceive as successful. Well, the truth is, neither can I.  What I have learned to do is to take an honest assessment of my work.  A great deal of it ends up sitting behind bookshelves, or painted over and over and over again. When we "critique" works of art, or perhaps attempts at works of art, we not only look for the part that flops, but we find the parts that succeed.

Well, here I am near, or perhaps at, the end of this painting.  I have reached the point where I feel there's still some tweaking to do, but I am not exactly sure what it is.  So, we are calling it done.  For now at least.  At this point I know it isn't a masterpiece and I strongly suspect it isn't wall worthy let alone gallery worthy.  Yet there are some good "take away" successes.  Let's talk about the things that work:

The last blog I had mentioned that I needed to do something with that yellow background.  Yellow is a very "advancing" color.  It just demands attention.  While I don't mind a little bit of a fight with the figure and the background as it keeps the eye bouncing, I don't want the background to "win" the feud.  By pulling some of that light ceruilean blue into the figure and into the darker background, I feel it has softened the struggle just enough.  For the most part, I incorporated this color into the highlights.  None the less, there are areas where that ceruilean blue just seems to sit upon the surface of the painting.  For some reason, this seems to help as well.

Another concern early on was that I keep the eye going all over the painting.  Otherwise, it could have been just a more traditional portrait and could have been cropped to a much smaller size.  Although one could argue whether the bottom half of the painting is actually necessary, I find that there's enough visual interest to have one's eye move to that area of the painting. The interest doesn't rest in the structure of the gown or the details of it.  The bottom of the gown is pretty boring.  But, the haphazard splashes of color and the ambiguity of the gown's edge as it goes into that Payne's grey shadow take the eye to the bottom half of the painting.

                                                                                                                                                                         The  third "take away" is that I have enjoyed the translucent quality of the layers of paint.  I still feel it has a slightly encaustic feel as a result of some of the mediums I had used.  Some areas are a bit "milky" or "hazy" and add to the effect.  For those of you that might be interested in experimenting let me explain what I have done here.  I used an acrylic gel medium quite a bit.  I also used a glazing medium.  At times, I mixed the two together.  At the start of the painting I mixed modeling paste with the gel medium and added color. This, combined with the chip board surface, gave me the initial texture I was seeking. I then used the palette knife to paint this mixture onto the prepared surface.  As I progressed I used the glazing medium mixed with color to apply thin washes when I wanted color to seep into crevices and used the gel mediums to color to heap more texture.  Finally, I sometimes just layered on a coat of gel medium alternately with full color paint.  This "sandwiched" the colors between layers and it gave a completely different effect than suspending color within the mediums.  There were moments when I used the brush to apply thin washes, and moments when I used a dry rag to wipe paint off of the surface.  I use a variety of "qualities" of paint.  While the "professional" paints seem to be superior when suspending them in the glazing medium, for the most part, I am pretty satisfied with a less expensive option.  If I were selling paintings for substantial sums of money, I may consider the investment into the higher quality of paint for the "lightfast" ratings.


Update: Jan 2018

I really think this will never be finished to my satisfaction.  I wasn't happy with the facial features, so I went over them again.  I am a little happier.  But I still feel as if the eyes are not quite real, and an ear is still to long.  I revisited the hands as well.  I do feel as if I have lost some consistency in texture as the face has become too detailed when compared to the hands.  I am not sure this matters.  One could say that it puts more focus on the face.  Well, here it is as it is for the moment.

Right now I am calling it "The Good Queen"  I am interested in that alert far away look in her eyes and the tying of the shawl.  She is prepared, ready for action at a moment's notice and unafraid.  She isn't lavished with jewels but yet she is "put together".  These are qualities I find in both of my daughters.  Well, usually anyway. 

 I wasn't able to work on this painting last weekend.  Today, I have made a little progress.  The eyes still need some work, but I feel better about the face in general.  Today, I worked on pushing the background back and made some effort to bring the face forward. 

There are a few things happening now that make me pretty happy.  First, I have been working with a gel medium and at times, a glazing medium.  The painting is beginning to look a bit waxy like that of an encaustic painting.  I hope I can retain that look.  Next, some repeating shapes are emerging and I am trying to decide if I should just run with it.  Principally, the blue arch and the bottom of the dress, as well as the sweep of the hands. At first glance I think these shapes help provide some sense of rhythm as well as aid in the structure of the composition.  Finally, I added some Payne's Grey at the base to weight the image and I am thinking that I may take the dress into this shadowy area and merge them.

As always, there are some problems that I need to think about.  I pulled the face in more clearly than I had intended.  As I back away from it I realize this creates an expectation for the rest of the painting.  The hands and the bottom of the dress may  need to be pulled in with equal clarity.  Also, the yellow is a color that advances into the foreground.  I will need to find a way to push that arch back.  I really wanted strong yellows and that bright blue in this painting when I started it.  They are enthusiastic, and optimistic colors.  Without them, the painting becomes more brooding.  I will wrestle with this for a while.  Finally, I need to reflect upon the mood I was reaching for in this painting.  I want mystery, optimism and bravery to be the impression in this painting.  I want her to "materialize" as one begins to grasp those ideas.  As the face becomes clearer, I wonder if it will be too clear.  I wonder if I need to lose some definition or grab onto more of it.  Perhaps I am over thinking it.

See you next week!  Feel free to share your thoughts.

Brianne

Original Photo

Lightened to see face

As I have said before, I keep a stash of pictures that "speak to me".  This image was one that was snapped of my daughter at a wedding.  I see a thousand paintings in this one image.  She could be a model of a Victorian mother gazing out the window at her children playing in the yard.  Her look says she is contemplating their future.  She would be holding a dainty teacup.  I see a warm yellow color palette with some splashes of pink.  Then I see a neo classical goddess, perhaps the huntress, Diana.  There's power and certainty in her eyes, a ferocious determination combined with courageous compassion.  My color palette changes to purples and rich browns. 

Most images translate well to "characters" that could be anybody.  But every painting I conjure up in my mind for this image is still my daughter Brianne.  She IS the Victorian woman, she IS Diana, she is Brianne.  I decided to just paint her, my daughter, Brianne.

Who is she?
She is a leader.  She is logical, intelligent and willful.  She is intimidating.  She will ferret out the truth with relentless tenacity.  Even if she has to dig it out of herself.  One of the proudest moments of my life as a mother was watching her walk through her divorce with grace, dignity, humility, faith and steady courage. 

For whatever reason, her husband abruptly left the marriage.  He walked out one night and never looked back.  It was unexpected.  We were all blindsided.  We knew their relationship had some serious "downs" but it also had incredible "highs".  After eight years, we thought they had it "figured out". 

Regardless of what he was up to, she turned to those around her and made us understand that this was about HER journey.  This was about HER story, who SHE was, and who SHE was going to be.  And she walked through it without malice.   She walked through it with faith intact.  She walked through it with love in her heart.  It has been almost a year now.  And she still hopes he is okay.

For me, a mother helplessly standing by, she has emerged from the shadows.  I see the determination in her eyes.  I see her searching the horizon, ready.  I see the quality of her bold, determined love.  She is fierce and tender at the same time.  She is proud and humble.

The painting.

Although I first imagined this painting in a hyper realism way, I quickly decided that wasn't what I wanted to portray.  I want her to "materialize".  I want the viewer to question what they see.  For this reason, I went back to the rough texture and the palette knife.  Painting this way keeps me looser and more intuitive.  Although I usually use a grid to map out the painting, I decided not to here.  The proportions are not as important as they usually are.  I tend to tighten up my paintings as I go, so I wanted to resist all the tools that would lead me in that direction.  Additionally, I decided to paint this on a piece of scrap construction material I had lying around.  It begins with two thick coats of gesso on waferboard.  On day one I laid down some yellows over the entire surface and used white to map out the figure and suggest the background.  I then took to the palette knives and started dropping in color.  Here is where the painting stands a day or so into the project.  From here, I have to let it sit while I think it through before I tackle the next hurdle in it. 

I am thinking about:  The look in the eyes.  That is the most important thing right now.  From there, I am thinking about shadows and light, and how they might tell her story.  The hands and the bottom of the picture will need some more visual interest.  (or else the painting could be shortened).  I have quite a bit of work to do before I am ready to call it "finished".  Tune in the next couple of weeks and see how this develops.  Let me know your thoughts.